The downside of keeping up
There are so many important people in my life that I haven't talked to in ages, and no doubt they believe that since I got married I no longer NEED them. What they don't know is that I DO. Need them, I mean. Or at the very least, MISS them. In fact, once a week or every few days, I think of them and make the move to connect with them. Which I do. I walk alongside them through their musings and foibles and major events. On the inside, at least, I laugh and cry and ponder with them.
The problem, of course, is that they never know. The other problem is that when people don't update their blogs, I miss out on the connection.
Thus, we encounter "the downside of keeping up". I HAVE been a faithful friend --- really I have! I'm just not the type to leave shallow comments after every post on someone's blog. I wish there was some way for people to know that I've been there - know that I've shown interest, without having to manufacture some witty or ridiculous comment just to make my presence known.
Maybe a hiatus from the internet to elimiate the feelings of false/one-sided intimacy and a good long distance plan would solve the problem.
Maybe.
posted by Nata at 2:55 p.m.
5 Comments:
It is true. I really don't need anyone I don't see anymore. New people have come into my life and are perfect for what I need right now. I often joke about people that I don't know that I've lived 24 years without them, surely I can survive another 24. But there are those very rare and few people, that really I couldn't survive another day not knowing that they weren't in my life.
But as you said, it is not so much need, but missing them and need them in a way you haven't needed them before. So dear Nata...I might not need you like I did when I was 19, but I do so miss you often!
As for commenting, I sort of understand what you mean. But I always wonder why people don't comment. I want to know who reads my blog and what they are thinking about. Is my blog impacting them in any way? Not that I want testimonies about how my blog changed someone's life, I just think that they are such a neat way to keep in touch with so many people at once. Truly brilliant, I say!
I know I have some closet blogger readers and I love them. But I as I am sharing with them, I want them to share back. Sure I write for the random guest, but I am writing to share with my friends, those I see all the time now and those who have fallen by the wayside. I want to know what is different in their life now and what sort of things they are doing. Who they have become and who they are still becoming. It is true that sort of thing can be done in person, but if you don't have that access...a long-distance plan could solve that problem.
But leaving a comment or 2 can help reduce the one-sided intimacy because it no longer becomes one-sided.
Anyways, I do miss you, dear roommate. And I too have linked you.
(It was sort of weird to see someone else call you roommate...but I suppose just as true...how's your new permanent roommate? ;))
10:57 a.m.
Forgot to mention...
I love the that poem -The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock. It's been awhile since I have read it. It has not been long forgetten, just not used. So thanks for bringing that back into my life.
10:59 a.m.
Oh roommate... I miss you so much! I love to hear what you have to say, even when it's just reading what you're saying. Someday maybe I'll be the friend that not only misses everyone, but keeps in touch with them too... I'm terrible at that. I do read blogs occasionally though, so they are my connection to my faraway friends, and I'm ever so glad that you're blogging now :)
3:37 p.m.
'kay, so I'm NOT a "roommate" and well to be honest this entire "blog" thing is kindda WEIRD! (aka foreign to me) but .... HELLO!
12:18 p.m.
hey nata :)
insert witty or ridiculous comment here
10:21 p.m.
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